Wait, just how many Pole Dance classes could one possibly take in a week? And if I’ve already gone through all the teeth-whitening and Burlesque prep, shouldn’t I be getting paid at this point?
"Do you have a hard time keeping your pants on?" That’s how I interpreted this ad. Stop judging me Living Social. It’s not my fault! Look what you’ve done to me, with all your relaxing crotch-ripping waxes, and seductive German folk-dancing. You’ve created a monster!
Well I guess they think I should start a resume. Too bad I missed this deal, I imagine it’s really hard to find a complete stranger that would be willing to take photographs of mostly nude people.
Peace of mind… Nothing says relaxation like having a chubby, middle-aged woman named Mathilda ripping out my pubes. That just screams relaxation. Actually, for my next vacation, I may just wax my entire body on my back porch. I can barely imagine how relaxing that would be.
OK, guys… now you’re getting a little pushy. “Waxing for a small area” - what does that even mean? Can I redeem that to remove the single, crazy, mutant hair I have on my shoulder that’s growing out of a freckle? What about if I want to wax my wrist hair, so that those stupid, sticky club bracelets don’t rip out my hair every time I remove them. LS, now you’re starting to make me a little self-conscious.
Ok, so Burlesque is NOT a german folk-dance. It’s history actually sounds a lot like what is happening to me with Living Social. (Check out the Wikipedia article) It started off all fun and games, mostly a comedy show. Then it started to get a little more daring over time. I think LS may be following this pattern and trying to help me get a jump start on a career in the “world’s oldest profession.”
But hey, some people may need a little waxing discount, I can understand that. Plus, I love Brazil, it’s probably just an innocent suggestion…